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St.
Valentine's Day -- [after St. Valentine (d.
A.D. 270)] -- February 14, day on which valentines and gifts are
exchanged with loved ones.
Are you tired
of watching the delivery boy bring flowers to everyone in the office
but you? Are you sick of seeing your buddies smooch with their girlfriends
while the only way you can get a liplock is to freeze your beer
bottle?
Pay attention
all you wannabe significant others -- Crescent Blues has
scoured the book stores and come up with a how-to list of manuals
to aid you in your quest for the perfect date (or mate) for Valentine's
Day.
Ready? Good!
First things first -- finding the perfect date. Not so easy you
say? Baloney, we say. And so do these authors.
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How to
Make Anyone Fall in Love With You by
Leil Lowndes; NTC/Contemporary Publishing, Paperback;
ISBN: 0809229897
Bestselling
author Leil Lowndes presents a surefire guide for anyone seeking
romantic bliss. How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You
offers 85 techniques based on scientific studies regarding the nature
of love, finding potential love partners, making an unforgettable
first impression, dodging "love bloopers" and establishing sexual
rapport. This well-known author has appeared on more than 200 television
shows.
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Guerrilla
Dating Tactics : Strategies, Tips, and Secrets for Finding Romance
by
Sharyn Wolf; Plume, Paperback; ISBN: 0452280117
This guide to
finding and being a good date is packed with practical information,
including tips on approaching a target, scoping out the terrain,
choosing ammunition and more.
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See? That wasn't
so hard, now was it? You finally managed to find someone dumb enough…ahem,
compatible enough to go out with you. That's good, but you still
have to get through that first date and then make them want to go
out with you again. According to the next two authors,
this is not a scenario from Mission: Impossible.
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Mars and
Venus on a Date : A Guide for Navigating the 5 Stages of Dating
to Create a Loving and Lasting Relationship by John Gray;
Harper Mass Market Paperbacks; ISBN: 0061044636
A self-help
guide for single people looking for love, this book examines the
five stages of dating -- attraction, ambivalence, commitment, true
intimacy, proposal/marriage -- and offers advice on how to find
a soulmate, develop a committed relationship, and more.
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Complete
Idiot's Guide to Seduction by Janet O'Neal, Sydney Biddle
Barrows; Alpha Books, Paperback; ISBN: 0028627385
For those still
looking for "the one" in a singles bar, this practical guide redefines
seduction for today's man and woman. Readers learn how to become
proactive in their love lives.
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You say you're
still having problems getting a date? Why not try a little
magic? Real magic, that is. Dust off your cauldron, put on
your pointy hat and repeat after us: "Eye of Michelle Pfeiffer and
toe of the Gibson Mel, conjure me…"
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Victorian
Grimoire : Romance, Enchantment, Magic by Patricia Telesco;
Llewellyn Publications, Paperback; ISBN: 0875427847
Magic with a
Victorian flair. Love potions and spells in abundance to help you
find the one you love.
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Modern
Sex Magick : Secrets of Erotic Spirituality by Donald Michael
Kraig, Linda Falorio, Nema, Tara;
Llewellyn Publications, Paperback; ISBN: 1567183948
This is one
of the first books to clearly reveal the secrets of Western sex
magic without relying on Tantric theory. (Crescent Blues
warning: Kids, don't try this at home. We recommend the back of
your parent's SUV.)
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Turning to the
subject of sex, Crescent Blues wants to know: how's
your lovemaking? What? You say the last person you kissed was your
Aunt Martha when you were 14 -- and you still haven't recovered
from the mustache burns? Tsk. Tsk. For those of you whose closest
physical relationship has been with their chiropractor we offer
the following:
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The Art
of Kissing by William Cane;
St. Martin's Press, Paperback; ISBN: 0312117442
A kiss is just
a kiss -- or is it? Since the initial publication of his comprehensive
kissers' manual, The Art of Kissing, William Cane
has received thousands of calls and letters from readers with questions
and comments about their kissing techniques. In this revised edition
of the international classic, he responds with more lip-smacking
wisdom -- and five new kisses.
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Sex for
Dummies by Ruth K., Dr. Westheimer;
IDG Books Worldwide, Paperback; ISBN: 1568843844
Vowing to educate
and inform millions of people about sex in a fun and interesting
way, Dr. Ruth Westheimer provides a complete guide to sex in the
Nineties, featuring information that all sexually active people,
parents of teens, grandparents, and others should be aware of. The
book even includes a tear-out "cheat-sheet."
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The Art
of Spooning : A Cuddler's Handbook by Jim Grace, Lisa Goldblatt
Grace;
Running Pr, Hardback; ISBN: 0762402709
Spooning is
a kind of horizontal hug, two bodies curling up so they fit perfectly
into each other's nooks and comfy places -- like two spoons in a
drawer! Never spooned before? Well, fear not! Expert spooners will
guide you through with ease. With helpful tips on simple pleasures
to set -- and keep -- a romantic, spoonful mood, The Art of
Spooning will bring out the spooner in you.
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And now for
Valentine's night. Perhaps you're planning an intimate candlelit
dinner for two? Instead of nuking two frozen dinners, why not heat
up your partner with some very special recipes guaranteed to not
only tickle their palate but jump start their hormones? Everyone
knows that the way to a man's (or a woman's) heart is through their
stomach. But we bet you didn't know that you can get even more than
just their hearts pounding with the right kinds of
food.
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Intercourses
: An Aphrodisiac Cookbook by Martha Hopkins, Ben Fink (Photographer),
Randall T. Lockridge; Terrace Pub, Hardback; ISBN:
0965327507
Chocolate...Sex...Honey...Sex...Strawberries...
Sex...Asparagus...
Sex...
ASPARAGUS!
Ever since Marc
Antony first fed Cleopatra grapes, sensual foods have been intertwined
with romance. InterCourses: An Aphrodisiac Cookbook
follows suit, bringing more than 85 heart-melting dishes to the
table, the bed, or wherever one might be entertaining. The array
of full-color photographs reveals the sensual side of seemingly
normal food.
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Food As
Foreplay : Recipes for Romance, Love and Lust by Cooking
Couple, Ellen Albertson, Michael Albertson, Michael Miracle (Illustrator);
Alexandria Pr, Paperback; ISBN: 0964664909
Contains over
100 quick, easy, fun recipes and dozens of tips that will get you
out of the kitchen and into the bedroom. The authors are happily
married, due in no small measure to practicing what they preach.
Food as Foreplay covers every aspect of a romantic
meal, from appetizers to dessert, and proper kitchen etiquette.
(By the way, cleaning up means showering together).
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You found the
date, you had the romantic night, now -- you have the rest of your
lives to look forward to. Once there's nothing left from Valentine's
Day except drooping roses and a squished chocolate cream, you'll
need to know how to keep the excitement going in your relationship.
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101 Nights
of Grrrreat Sex : Secret Sealed Seductions for Fun Loving Couples
by Laura Corn; Park Avenue Pub, Paperback;
ISBN: 0962962813
Intriguingly
packaged, 101 Nights is reminiscent of the book-in-plain-brown-wrapper,
except in this case each page is sealed. No peeking! Once a week,
according to 101's instructions, each lover picks a sealed page
and tears it out of the book, keeping it a secret. Scenarios include
"Up Against the Wall," "Angel with a Lariat," "Fire down Below,"
and "Point of No Return." Follow the scenario and, throughout the
week, expect any number of erotic surprises.
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2002 Days
& Nights of Sex by Richard Smith; Black
Dog & Leventhal Pub, Hardback; ISBN: 1579120458
Make the most
of your sex life every month of the year. A great gift for newlyweds
as well as silver anniversary couples, this hysterical compilation
offers witty tidbits, sexual horoscope readings, recipes, intimacy
tests, and much more, making it the perfect bedside companion.
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Hey. Wait a
minute. You -- there at the back of the Web… Yeah, you. Why aren't
you out with the rest of the poor schmoos looking for love in all
the usual places? Oh we see -- you just got dumped. Ouch. Crescent
Blues feels your pain. How about the following books to
help you through this troublesome time?
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The Woman's
Book of Revenge: Tips on Getting Even When 'Mr. Right' Turns Out
to Be All Wrong by Christine Gallagher; Carol
Pub Group, Paperback;
ISBN: 0806520361
Whether sewing
a chicken leg into his mattress or calling time information in Tokyo
and leaving his phone off the hook, these devilish tips help women
get over their anger with humor, imagination, and, if need be, get
even!
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How to
Stay Single Forever by Jenny Lombard;
Warner Books, Paperback; ISBN: 0446671940
Serious relationships
are risky, time-consuming, expensive -- and often end up with someone
getting hurt. Who needs that? Using these 101 strategies -- including
talking baby talk in bed, wearing a bathing suit that has a skirt
and being brutally honest -- today's independent woman can easily
avoid meaningful relationships with aplomb.
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No matter if
you're looking for love, enjoying life with your soul mate or lamenting
the loss of your latest significant other, Crescent Blues
hopes that you have a great Valentine's Day. As for us, we're keeping
a weather eye out for that rotten little brat with the bow and arrow.
Oh no! Get the butterfly net; he's headed for the White House. Again!
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Teri
Dohmen
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