Meet Joe Black: The Body Pitt
But, nooooooo. I can't say either one of those, because I went for Brad Pitt's cute bod.
Honest. No other reason to waste quality practice time that could've been spent on the Area 51 game at the mall, staring dreamily at a movie screen.
Go ahead, you have my permission to pity me.
But seriously, Meet Joe Black was worth my time, my money, and maybe even my wide screen copy of Titanic. (Okay, maybe not Titanic.) In fact, my only question concerning the whole thing was why in the name of everything Eeyore eats for dinner there was a bed in the pool room!
So, the story... Bill Parrish (Anthony Hopkins) is everybody's cuddle bunny. What I mean is that there is no one on God's green earth who does not like this guy. And why not? He's smart, sweet, and everyone who knows him seems to forgive him that uncanny resemblance to Hannibal Lector.
Bill has two daughters, and the younger one, Susan (Claire Forlani), is daddy's little girl. When she's not suffering through some sort of squinting disease that I think only I have diagnosed, Susan's a doctor. One day, before work, she runs into this cute lawyer (Brad Pitt) at a diner. They get to talking, and immediately click. Unfortunately, she's obviously never even heard of Brad Pitt, because she leaves without giving him her phone number.
Later that night, Bill is throwing a small dinner party for his family when poof, Death shows up. Well, Death in the cute lawyer's body. (How Death gets a hold on that sucker has to be the coolest scene in the movie.) Death's been pestering Bill all day. You know how Death gets. Whispering things in your ear that no one else can hear, giving you near heart attacks, hiding your car keys -- man, that Death needs a life.
The pair strike up a deal -- Death, who came to take Bill, will wait to take the old man if Bill promises to show him around. Well, heck, Bill's all for it, and the next thing everyone knows, Death -- Joe Black -- is doing things with Susan that weren't in the brochure. (I know for a fact that "sex with Susan" was, at the very least, not in the "Museum Tours of New York" section.)
What follows is two hours of wacky hilarity... okay, so maybe not wacky hilarity, but there is a lot of thinking. The good kind of thinking, where you contemplate the meaning of life, the depth of a human being's love, and the outside chances of getting hooked up with Brad Pitt.
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Our Readers Respond
Meet Joe Black was looonggg! But that's good news for all you girls out there who simply adore Brad's cool, sexy air. I thought it was great value for money -- I mean, three hours of Brad, on a big screen!
He was sweet, innocent, not to mention drop-dead gorgeous, and I thought he was an excellent actor in acting Death and this other guy who gets his body taken over by Death for a holiday. In the end I was like "But I like Death more! Bring him back!" showing he had more to him than the sexiest body on earth.
The movie was pretty weird. The sex scene went from fully dressed by the pool to naked on this bed that popped out of nowhere -- unless it was next to the pool -- to fully dressed by the pool again!!? And was Brad Pitt frowning?!
The car accident scene? Psycho!
Anthony Hopkins playing someone who is sweet one moment, yelling at the top of his voice the next? Wait, that's normal for him.
The girl Brad Pitt falls in loves with has this weird scene where she cries and makes everyone think she knows he's Death, but then we find she doesn't know!!
So there. Watch Meet Joe Black if you spend that much on posters and mags of Brad Pitt anyway.